Ever wonder how cavemen broke up with one another?
Like did you come home and find your pictograph smeared off of the cave wall? Some new Neanderthal drawn in your place? Like archaic sticker family decals.
Don’t grunt at me like that. You’ve been so lofty ever since you started walking upright. Get the fuck out of my cave. I hope you get eaten by a saber tooth tiger.
Maybe they just came home to find the cave empty. The little cave woman took everything - your favorite sharp stick, the pelts, and of course - the fire. You can’t even whack her over the head with a club, because the bitch took that too.
Maybe that’s why all the pottery found in archaeological digs is in pieces. It wasn’t broken over time, just smashed as part of an prehistoric domestic dispute. Proof that throughout human history, we were never able to have nice things.