The expression "First World Problem" is now ruining my ability to dwell and enjoy my First World problems.
Oh, but at least it's not disease or famine right? WRONG.
Because even if it was disease or famine, it would be First World disease, or First World famine. Then I would be starving, suffering and a dick because I'm not doing so Third World-style.
Wow, how horribly insensitive Jessica! How can you be so callous?
What are you gonna do? Tell the Third World on me? Go ahead. Call or email them...oh wait...
And besides, I'm fairly sure they don't give a shit in the midst of their starvation and civil unrest. Think the Sudan is going to take pause from genocide to notice what I say? Not even I'm that pompous.
Or, perhaps they will all become so incensed, that they unite against me - their new common enemy. In which case, you're welcome.