Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Did You Save Any Room For Dessert?
Ice cream made from breast milk has been removed from a central London restaurant on health grounds following complaints by members of the public. Umm, eww! As a member of the public I am lending my complaint to this as well.
The dessert, called Baby Gaga, went on sale at ice cream parlour Icecreamists in Covent Garden in February. This is exactly why British people have bad teeth. And aren't very creative. That name is stupid.
But Westminster Council officers removed the product to make sure it was "fit for human consumption". Yes fit for BABY HUMAN consumption. Not by grown ups.
Icecreamist founder Matt O'Connor said: "Our donor was screened at a leading medical clinic." First of all, there is no such thing as an "icecreamist." Second, gross. Did the donor tell the leading medical clinic what she was receiving this screening in order to do? Because then I think she would have received a referral to a leading mental institution.
"The mixture is fully pasteurised." This is a terrible follow-up point. It doesn't matter if it's fully, partially or quasi...it's still breastmilk. This sentence is just as insulting as saying "Some of my best friends are black" after saying something racist. And all races hate breastmilk ice cream.
The ice cream was churned with donations from London mother Victoria Hiley, and served with a rusk and an optional shot of Calpol or Bonjela. Each serving costs £14. Coincidentally, Victoria Hiley is also the London weirdo. WTF is a rusk? Does that make it not breastmilk? No? Oh, then who cares...You couldn't pay me £14 to eat this woman's breastmilk.
Westminster council said it had received two complaints from members of the public and concerns were raised by the Health Protection Agency and Food Standards Agency. HOW ARE THERE ONLY TWO COMPLAINTS??
Tory Westminster Councillor Brian Connell said: "Selling foodstuffs made from another person's bodily fluids can lead to viruses being passed on and, in this case, potentially hepatitis. It also spreads the heebie jeebies.
"As the local authority we will support small businesses and applaud innovative ideas wherever possible, but must protect the health of consumers." This is not an innovative idea. Babies have been all over this since the beginning of mankind. And we ween them off of it! It's like frozen de-evolution!!
Mr O'Connor, said: "We have had an amazing response - many women have come forward and offer to give us milk. Now my stereotypes about how screwed up British people are have been entirely founded. Put some bras on these women and shut the ice cream factory down! Do you think this will make teen pregnancy rise? Girls dreaming of one day becoming icecreamists. It's a sordid path...all that pumping, churning and grossness. You'll just end up with some soda jerk.
"You can buy buy alcohol and tobacco but not breast milk in Westminster. If there was ever a statement to be a town motto! Hell yes I would live in this city. Crime-ridden, poor and filled with beer guzzling nicotine addicts but God bless it you can't buy breastmilk. My kind of city.
Or maybe they can restrict breastmilk sales to state-run boobie stores. Don't get caught making moonshine ladies.
"If Westminster bans this then I am going to begin a protest with mums who have already shown support." Perv.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-12615353
The dessert, called Baby Gaga, went on sale at ice cream parlour Icecreamists in Covent Garden in February. This is exactly why British people have bad teeth. And aren't very creative. That name is stupid.
But Westminster Council officers removed the product to make sure it was "fit for human consumption". Yes fit for BABY HUMAN consumption. Not by grown ups.
Icecreamist founder Matt O'Connor said: "Our donor was screened at a leading medical clinic." First of all, there is no such thing as an "icecreamist." Second, gross. Did the donor tell the leading medical clinic what she was receiving this screening in order to do? Because then I think she would have received a referral to a leading mental institution.
"The mixture is fully pasteurised." This is a terrible follow-up point. It doesn't matter if it's fully, partially or quasi...it's still breastmilk. This sentence is just as insulting as saying "Some of my best friends are black" after saying something racist. And all races hate breastmilk ice cream.
The ice cream was churned with donations from London mother Victoria Hiley, and served with a rusk and an optional shot of Calpol or Bonjela. Each serving costs £14. Coincidentally, Victoria Hiley is also the London weirdo. WTF is a rusk? Does that make it not breastmilk? No? Oh, then who cares...You couldn't pay me £14 to eat this woman's breastmilk.
Westminster council said it had received two complaints from members of the public and concerns were raised by the Health Protection Agency and Food Standards Agency. HOW ARE THERE ONLY TWO COMPLAINTS??
Tory Westminster Councillor Brian Connell said: "Selling foodstuffs made from another person's bodily fluids can lead to viruses being passed on and, in this case, potentially hepatitis. It also spreads the heebie jeebies.
"As the local authority we will support small businesses and applaud innovative ideas wherever possible, but must protect the health of consumers." This is not an innovative idea. Babies have been all over this since the beginning of mankind. And we ween them off of it! It's like frozen de-evolution!!
Mr O'Connor, said: "We have had an amazing response - many women have come forward and offer to give us milk. Now my stereotypes about how screwed up British people are have been entirely founded. Put some bras on these women and shut the ice cream factory down! Do you think this will make teen pregnancy rise? Girls dreaming of one day becoming icecreamists. It's a sordid path...all that pumping, churning and grossness. You'll just end up with some soda jerk.
"You can buy buy alcohol and tobacco but not breast milk in Westminster. If there was ever a statement to be a town motto! Hell yes I would live in this city. Crime-ridden, poor and filled with beer guzzling nicotine addicts but God bless it you can't buy breastmilk. My kind of city.
Or maybe they can restrict breastmilk sales to state-run boobie stores. Don't get caught making moonshine ladies.
"If Westminster bans this then I am going to begin a protest with mums who have already shown support." Perv.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-12615353
Status Update
I'm other-oriented in the sense that I think people should be oriented to others as part of general practice but admittedly, I'm horrible at it myself. I don't pry, so you shouldn't pry. But sometimes people want you to pry because apparently that's called being a good listener and people like it.
So as other-oriented and socially aware as I like to consider myself, I often miss cues. Yeah, I'm self-absorbed so if you need my attention say it. And I'll happily dedicate some time to hear your woes and offer advice. I like you. That's why we're friends on Facebook. I'm genuinely invested in your snippets. Just say what's on your mind.
You could just scan your friends' woes all on one page. Everyone is just saying what is on their mind. Oh, you're having a bad day? Here's a <3 thing. Bad break up? ((HUGS)). Accomplished something? Like
I'm such a good friend.
But then everyone went and got all cryptic with their status and the cues I miss in person, I also now miss online. I'm sorry, but I don't know EVERY song by The Cure, so that obscure reference you made to their 1984 B-side reflecting your bottomless pit of infinite sadness was totally lost on me. I can't tell if you need a <3 or an iTunes account.
The whole Person A "Everything is horrible" status is equally perplexing. Alright, so you were more specific than quoting Little Women but I don't know if you need a <3, some XOXOXO or maybe ((HUGS)) with lots of extra (((((()))))))) like I'm trying to pop your head off.
Seriously dude, I'll smother the fuck out of you with ((())), just let me know.
And of course, someone asks "What's the matter?" but Person A never responds. Did you get all indignant that one or two of your closest 836 Facebook friends wants to know your business? I'm only a casual acquaintance of Person A and I already know that "everything is horrible" so you might as well follow up with the details. Is it your everything or everything in the world everything? I'd like a head's up on a 28 Days everything is horrible kind of everything.
Imagine if this had happened in Libya?
Aabida Ahmed "This is total bullshit."
So as other-oriented and socially aware as I like to consider myself, I often miss cues. Yeah, I'm self-absorbed so if you need my attention say it. And I'll happily dedicate some time to hear your woes and offer advice. I like you. That's why we're friends on Facebook. I'm genuinely invested in your snippets. Just say what's on your mind.
You could just scan your friends' woes all on one page. Everyone is just saying what is on their mind. Oh, you're having a bad day? Here's a <3 thing. Bad break up? ((HUGS)). Accomplished something? Like
I'm such a good friend.
But then everyone went and got all cryptic with their status and the cues I miss in person, I also now miss online. I'm sorry, but I don't know EVERY song by The Cure, so that obscure reference you made to their 1984 B-side reflecting your bottomless pit of infinite sadness was totally lost on me. I can't tell if you need a <3 or an iTunes account.
The whole Person A "Everything is horrible" status is equally perplexing. Alright, so you were more specific than quoting Little Women but I don't know if you need a <3, some XOXOXO or maybe ((HUGS)) with lots of extra (((((()))))))) like I'm trying to pop your head off.
Seriously dude, I'll smother the fuck out of you with ((())), just let me know.
And of course, someone asks "What's the matter?" but Person A never responds. Did you get all indignant that one or two of your closest 836 Facebook friends wants to know your business? I'm only a casual acquaintance of Person A and I already know that "everything is horrible" so you might as well follow up with the details. Is it your everything or everything in the world everything? I'd like a head's up on a 28 Days everything is horrible kind of everything.
Imagine if this had happened in Libya?
Aabida Ahmed "This is total bullshit."
- Haleema Amel "What's the matter?"
- Ra'fat Mohamed "Hope everything is ok! (((HUGS)))"
- 1 person likes this
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